American Healthcare

One night In December, I woke up in terrible pain. It felt like someone was stabbing me in the stomach with a knife, and I could hardly move. I woke Grant up and he was so worried about me he wanted to take me into the emergency room, but I was worried about the cost, so I plead with him to wait and see if it would go away, while he is so upset and worried he's begging me to go in. I know a fair bit of layman's medicine and didn't think it was anything urgent, but we got onto the Internet and read up everything we could to be sure. After about 20 minutes, I can't take it any more and I agree to go in, but while I'm dressing it finally stops.

On all accounts, waking up in the middle of the night in excruciating pain is something to be concerned about, and something you should be able to see a doctor about. But I was worried about the cost, so I waited. Over the next month and a half I keep having pain, lesser, but in the same spot. It's only every couple of days, and it's tolerable, and webmd.com says it's probably a stone of some kind, so not terribly urgent. But when it doesn't go away, I finally relent and go into the doctor. Anyway, I had a couple other issues that were causing me trouble, so I though I'd save on the co-pay and go in for all at once. I figure I'm being as frugal as is sensible.

The doctor was clearly from the school of CYA. He ordered so many tests - MRI, Cat Scan, x-Ray, Ultrasound, lab work-ups. I nodded and asked as many questions as I could, then went home and threw away half of the prescribed tests because I was afraid of the cost. I rationed my care, and only scheduled the couple that seemed most important.

Everyone was very nice when they gave me the tests, and a couple days later the doctor called to say that they were normal and he didn't know what had caused the pain, but I was probably OK. I don't get a diagnosis.

Nothing happens for three months. The pain gradually fades and goes away. I breath a sigh of relief but am also a bit nervous - maybe the tests I didn't do would have shown something. I wait.

I just got the bill. I have health insurance. The bill was $600. That's a lot of money for me. It makes things really hard.

I sit here and I look at the bill, and I wonder - should I have gone in? Should I have waited longer? Should I have refused more of the tests, or asked their cost and done only the cheap ones? And I worry, I worry that next time, I'll ask myself whether it hurts $600 worth, and I'll decide it doesn't, and I won't go in, and it will be serious.

And I'm angry, because I tried so hard to be careful, to be sensible but frugal.

And I worry about what happens when this limited-term insurance runs out and I still don't have a job with benefits and the bill would be $3700 and I have to weigh my health, my life, against these sums.